i dedicate this to my three best friends..!
I was a tiny little worm with a few friends. They were not exactly my type yet they were my friends. We were friends because we look alike, we move alike and we feed on leaves together. But unlike my friends, eating was my only business every day.
As days passed, there was a friction in our relationship. They said that I was changing and started avoiding me. I did not notice any changes in me until the day I realized that my friends remained the same but I was growing bigger and bigger in size.
There were clashes between us because they could not accept me as such. In every matter, they required agreement only from beings of their kind and I was soon considered an alien. I was lonely and I wanted to get back to form, to look just like them, to be with them but I could not stop eating.
As days passed, I got frustrated and hated my living. My loneliness gave me new experiences. whenever i was at the verge of an emotional setback, hating myself to the core, I felt the presence of invisible spirits soothing me, guiding me and consoling me. day by day I heard many voices. To say exactly, I heard three different voices. i never understood anything. i just thought it was my illusion - a mental effect of loneliness and frustration. I built a shell around myself and stayed there not going anywhere, not speaking with anyone and notably not eating anymore. but still i din't stop hearing the voices making me doubt if it is really nothing but illusion. slowly,I started recognizing those voices and we became friends. I was comfortable. Moreover, I was happy inside that secluded shell. visible or invisible they are my friends now
Months rolled by, but they never left me. They were not bored with my stupidity rather they started transforming me. I felt that they were moulding me into someone completely un expectable. Their vigorous advises and lectures with love and care for me, gave me the courage to break the shell. I was amazed at who I was after months of dormancy. I was a beautiful butterfly with colorful wings.
I was confused, amazed, worried and surprised at the same time. I know that I’ll gain more friends very soon or at least no more daggers of being avoided as I look beautiful now. I thought so,because the society first judges with the look.I do not need any of the new acquaintances. All I need, is my three good old shell mates. I know that they exist. They are not just voices. I was more worried about not hearing from my friends again than being happy for what i am now or enjoy the world after so many days. As a blessing from the Almighty, my friends never left me. They have become the colors in my wings, speaking to me always, guiding me always and making my life colorful and beautiful, forever.
-VIDHYALAKSHMI.T
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A breathtaking story. Its beautiful how to described the friendship. Although you could make it better by adding details to it. Work on it. Nevertheless, it was a good read.
thank you
Nice Vidhya... hold on...
Hi! chancesnchanges here..
I liked the craftiness you used to describe friendship. They way you relate it to the life of a butterfly. I agree that we became friends to people that for some reason we don't know. Sometimes, we don't blend well with them because we have our individual differences. Though, we also affect their living because of our differences. On the part where the butterfly had heard invisible voices I am not pretty sure if I got what you are conveying as the voices. But I have some ideas in mind. I, also, liked when you thanked our Almighty for the blessings He gave..
Keep going..
=)
Hey Vidhya,
As a story I was intrigued in it. It looked as if an allegory to a strong moral in staunch fable style narration. I have to say there weren't much details or description but it was smooth.
# Always capitalize the " i "
# Always start a sentence with the capital letter.
#
But these are just typos and you can correct them easily.
I do like how it started of in this kind of way. Somebody growing out of proportions. and being regarded as an outsider. As I said before, it gives a fable kind of effect. A little more detail and plot could do good to it but it is quite okay as it is now.
Keep writing!
This is a very heartwarming piece! You should go through it, however, and capitalize all the "I"'s and look for other spelling, capitalization, or grammar mistakes, as there are quite a few of them.
While there is a lot of great emotion in this piece (I applaud you for being able to bring the happiness out so strongly, a lot of writers find it easier to present hunks of sad feelings, not joyous ones), it has a weak plot and not much description. I suggest re-writing it to be a longer piece (maybe even two parts? Before and after the metaphorical [right?] butterfly's hatching from its cocoon?) and adding in more detail to meld with your great emotion.
Nice job for a first draft!
Keep writing,
Justagirl
it was out standing article.
my heart melted reading this article.
i like these lines very much" I heard three different voices. i never understood anything. i just thought it was my illusion - a mental effect of loneliness and frustration. I built a shell around myself and stayed there not going anywhere, not speaking with anyone and notably not eating anymore. but still i din't stop hearing the voices making me doubt if it is really nothing but illusion. slowly,I started recognizing those voices and we became friends. I was comfortable. Moreover, I was happy inside that secluded shell. visible or invisible they are my friends now. we play, we fight, we tease each other and we enjoy. soon, i started feeling that we were freinds for years.
Months rolled by, but they never left me. They were not bored with my stupidity rather they started transforming me. I felt that they were moulding me into someone completely unexpectable. Their vigorous advises and lectures with love and care for me, gave me the courage to break the shell. I was amazed at who I was after months of dormancy. I was a beautiful butterfly with colorful wings.
I was confused, amazed, worried and surprised at the same time. I know that I’ll gain more friends very soon or atleast no more daggers of being avoided as I look beautiful now. I thought so,because the society first judges with the look.I do not need any of the new acquaintances. All I need, is my three good old shell mates. I know that they exist. They are not just voices. I was more worried about not hearing from my friends again than being happy for what i am now or enjoy the world after so many days. As a blessing from the Almighty, my friends never left me. They have become the colors in my wings, speaking to me always, guiding me always and making my life colorful and beautiful, forever."